Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Use Somebody

Use Somebody

I've been roaming around
i was looking down at all i see
painting faces, building places i can't reach

you know that i could use somebody
you know that i could use somebody
someone like you

and all you know
and how you speak
countless lovers undercover of the street

you know that i could use somebody
you know that i could use somebody
someone like you

off in the night,
why'd you live it up?
-i'm off to sleep
waging war
to shake the cold(?)
---?

i hope it's going to make you notice
i hope it's going to make you notice
someone like me
someone like me
someone like me

somebody

(i'm waiting)

someone like you
somebody
someone like you
somebody
someone like you
somebody

i've been running around
i was looking down at all i see

To an early start

I finally cleaned out my life. Sadly not everyone mad it out with me. I felt like a fresh start was something i was desperately in need of. I took everything off my walls, pictures, posters, everything. All that's left are the markings on my walls of the memories i once cherished. It just seems easier to forget about the things that once made you smile if they are no longer in your face everyday to make you cry. I guess what you said was right, friends for season, friends for reasons and friends who care. The past few months showed me that very few of my friends fell under the category of those who care. And more than i was willing to admit to myself were in one of the other two. But we were in between, we feel in the middle of friends for seasons and friends who reasons. Now that reason is no longer valid and the season has passed im moving on. It hurts to let you go but it kills me little by little to hold on. And i am way to young to die of a broken heart caused by someone who never cared. So i continue my journey to better my life and myself. I cleared my room, my mind and now all i need to do is clear my heart and start new. So bare with me as i am sure i will be hitting a few pot holes along the way.

Monday, November 10, 2008

I'm sorry

Im sorry I've let you down, that Ive done so many things wrong,
That all i seem to do is hurt you and make you cry.

Im sorry that everyone else is always before you,
that i never take into consideration your feelings.

Im sorry i continue to break your heart and dont seem to care,
That i hate you more than i love you.

Im sorry that i wont let you be happy because others would be miserable,
That i'll never let you be yourself because the world cant handle who you are.

Im sorry that i'll forever hide the light that shines in your eyes,
that i'll keep it as a secret inside my heart and never share it with the world.

Im sorry that im slowly killing you and soon you will no longer matter,
no one knows you to remember you and no will ever have the chance to.

I'm sorry....................

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Michael Buble-Lost

I can't believe it's over
I watched the whole thing fall
And I never saw the writing that was on the wall
If I'd only knew
The days were slipping past
That the good things never last
That you were crying

Summer turned to winter
And the snow it turned to rain
And the rain turned into tears upon your face
I hardly recognize the girl you are today
And God I hope it's not too late
It's not too late

'Cause you are not alone
I'm always there with you
And we'll get lost together
Until the light comes pouring through
It's when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When your world's crashing down
And you can't bear the cross
I said, babe, you're not lost

Life can show no mercy
It can tear your soul apart
It can make you feel like you've gone crazy but you're not
Things have seemed to change
There's one thing that's still the same
In my heart you have remained
And we can fly fly fly away

'Cause you are not alone
And I am there with you
And we'll get lost together
Until the light comes pouring through
It's when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
And the world's crashing down
And you can not bear the cross



I said, baby, you're not lost
I said, baby, you're not lost
I said, baby, you're not lost
I said, baby, you're not lost

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Winding Road..




Don't leave me standing here alone,
I don't know which way is home.

You were always there to hold my hand
Now that you're gone i don't know that i can stand.

This feeling of being alone with out the warmth of your smile
Has a whole burning inside my chest that i now will be around for a while.

Please don't leave me standing here alone,
I dont think i can make it on my own,

Why did you have to leave so quickly with out notice not leaving behind any answers,
The only explanation i had was the words that the doctor said to me "its cancer"

Please dont leave me standing here alone, im lost, broken confused.....





Saturday, June 7, 2008

Bitter/Sweet

It's been a year since I've seen your smile,
And here we stand, across the room from each other.

My heart races, My palms sweat,
My stomach starts to knot.

Have things changed? Have you changed?
Do are hearts still fit together?

As I walk towards you my is heart racing,
My steps slow down.


And there ...In front of me..
The time stops, everything freezes...

She's beautiful, this women,
who has stolen your heart.

The reason for all your amazing smiles,
the reason that fire still burns inside your eyes,

I put a brave face on as my heart starts to crack,
I continue my steps towards you.

Because I'd rather see you smile then be,
The reason why your tears fall at night.

Sugar Coated B.S


What is one more lie?
You were never a fan of the truth.

Sugar coated bullshit,
That broke my heart.

How can I love to be around you,
Yet hate everything that makes you exactly who you are?

So many smiles, so many laughs,
Yet so many tears, so many disappointments.

I wanna let you go,
but i dont know how.

Beautifully Imperfect


Can't you see that I'm not perfect?
Don't you understand that I'm just me?

I may be just a simple girl to you,
Nothing special or unique.

But I like me just as I am,
I realize it is more than enough.

And although I may not be perfect,
I am perfect for someone.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Burning Sun

It was written in the stars that warm august night.
That fate would finally bring me something to make my life right.

All my life i wondered if I looked in every corner, every hole, every place,

I could fill that empty space.

Looking for that missing piece,
That would finally show me exactly who I was.


I walked in that room and there, Shinning as bright as the sun could burn.
There it was, my answer, my missing piece, ................Me

From that moment on exposing my true identity to the world,
Daring to be exactly what i imagined.


Not afraid to be hurt because i knew,
That now my heart was safe.


Locked away in a chamber where no key fit,
And a guard stood armed.


I could now be free to love every moment,
Because now...I can truly say....I am me.


And I owe it to that warm august night,
For allowing the sun to shine so bright.

Careless You....


I hate you for being so careless with my heart, You knew it was easily broken.

I let my guard down and let you in,
This place in my heart No one had ever been to.

All you did was go in and tare it up from the inside out. Leaving nothing but the the broken pieces behind.

But i'll just keep waiting because someday
Someone will come into my life and put back the pieces you broke apart.


So i'll sit here in this room alone and one day that person will come to and stitch up my heart and I promise you'll think back and say "she was the best i never had"

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Lets NOT go off roading!...

Someone i know recently said "life is like driving on the freeway" sometimes we hit these bumps in the road but we always manage to get past them and reach our destination. Can i say i agree with this analogy? Not really. I thought a lot this weekend about what this person had said and the things i had been through in my life and i came up with my own twist on his analogy. We are all driving down the freeway, the difference is some of us choose to exit the freeway and go off-roading. We then choose to complain about the bumps in the road that we are some what at fault for happening. We make the decision to take the hard more "adventures" road instead of sticking to a more smooth sailing trip. We then dwell on the hardships putting ourselves in this "meh" emotionless rut we cant seem to pull ourselves out of. When in reality we have done this to ourselves, so we really have no right to complain about what is happening. We can exit the freeway and off road our way to our happy ending making ourselves feel like shit along the way...or...we can choose to stay on the freeway, put your best friend in the front seat of your car, blaring the music as load as it will go and just enjoy the ride. Embracing the potholes here and there because they help shape who we will become in the end, but never letting it stop us or bring us down. Because in the end the bigger picture is much more beautiful then the grey off roading we sometimes choose to see. 

Sitting, Wishing, Waiting....


Have you ever thought about the whole "everyone has a soul mate" thing?
I have and it doesn't really make sense to me.... Do i believe in love of course, do i believe that for every person there is someone for them? Not really. I think that everyone is entitled to 3 great loves in life. Some are lucky enough to end up with one of or thee great love of there life. And some of us spend are whole lives waiting for the unicorn to show up at are door steps but they never do. For those who dont find the "one" they always find someone who's gonna let them forget about the fa
irytale ending we always want and enjoy what we have with who we have. Not exactly what we dreamed up growing up but like they say "can't always get what you want".